As artists, If we are True to Ourselves, Must we Apologize for that??
Thursday, September 20th, 2012I really need your help, readers! Your remarks to this post will be genuinely appreciated. Maybe you could consider this a chance for you to teach ME something, okay??
In my 72nd year on planet Earth, I still do not seem to be able to operate in a world where one must strictly adhere to RULES that seem unfair, oppressive, suppressive and repressive, or just plain stupid!!
So please help me out here and educate me on how to exist in a world I don’t seem to fit into sometimes.
Have you noticed how sometimes, Life’s lessons come with a tsunami of insults, or humiliation and embarrassment, often with a lot of pain and upset? This could actually be why we put off learning most of these valuable lessons, for who wants to feel that pain? Certainly, not I!
However, there comes a time, sooner or later, that we have no choice but to learn the lessons,
which Life has been trying to teach us, and we are forced to act upon them in order to salvage or just maintain the important relationships in our lives, or fix something we broke. And… it can often be a turning point…for better or worse depending on what action we take.
If a young singer auditions for a part or in a competition and is rejected, he or she could decide
to take that business course the parents recommended and forget about a career in music, or…
he or she could find a new resolve to continue on the path that holds their dream and come
back stronger and with more than conviction and committment than ever before.
Barbra Streisand wrote in her autobiography that it was her Mother, who berated her on a daily basis and never uttered a whisper of praise during Barbra’s upbringing that contained praise or encouragement, which gave her the drive to succeed…if only to show her mean mother that she could.
That requires a lot of moxxy (gumption or spunk), and a good amount of work, commitment, and drive!
Other singers can hear one sentence of criticism from someone like Simon Cowell and immediately shrink
from a dream that had been growing in them for years before that moment, and watch it die right before their very own eyes.
So what is it that reveals to the person which action will be taken? Is it the way in which
we are raised by our parents that determines how we respond to negative situations? Maybe.
I wonder if it might very well be not so much HOW we were raised but WHERE??? Why do people think one way in a large metropolis and in another way in a small town?
I think that there exists in communities across the globe, a collective consciousness that dictates a person’s thinking and behavior, which may be acceptable in one community but not in another. And this
factor alone can make life very hard for an individual who is let’s say, naturally comfortable in his skin, fairly true to himself and accepting of his or her natural proclivities and idiosyncrasies.
If one comes from a very small town somewhere where doors are never locked and people say
“good morning” to everyone they meet, and then happen to move to a larger town in another section of the country, with a much larger and diverse population, where doors are always locked and it’s safer to remain aloof and be so quick to say “good morning” to everyone they meet…that person could find
that he needs to adjust certain habits in order to peacefully co-exist in the new environment. That’s just common sense!
Well, I have seen something else at play here, something far deeper than just locking your doors and not being too generous with your speech. What I have found in some communities is an undercurrent of “social behavior RULES” that stifle individuality, passion, self-acceptance, and self-expression, and this can create a myriad of problems for many people…including artists…NO…ESPECIALLY artists!
Lets say one comes from a large metropolis like Los Angeles, or Chicago, and moves to a smaller town where there seems to be a diversity of cultures on the outside, but when we dig a little deeper, we may find a false sense of security, some distrust, considerable isolation, and one discovers that it may be prudent to hold’s one tongue for fear of offending someone or something.
On one extreme, one can stand on a street corner in NYC, and exercise his 1st amendment right to free speech, for example, by screaming at the top of his lungs that the Martians have landed in Long Island, while simultaneously one can witness the populace of NYC walking by and completely ignoring that “nutcase” with the flyers, unmoved and completely unbothered by the rants of this person on the soap box.
But behavior like that in a small town can scare the heebie-jeebies of out the proletariat, and even
cause it to turn against the offending individual in a flash!
Maybe because we are in an election year where political viewpoints are so varied and vocal
that I tend to see opinion as a consequence of one’s location rather than any other factor.
And in a community where free expression can be viewed as threatening, even an innocent
remark that disagrees with what is widely considered acceptable behavior, an expressive artist can wither and die.
For if we can’t express ourselves, even through our art, where it’s supposed to be okay, then
where are we? What are we doing in a place that won’t permit one’s own healthy viewpoint about
anything?
Shall I be responsible for a person’s comfort level if I say or do something that makes him afraid, insecure or threatened? Really? Is that my job? Even if what I said or did was in no way whatsoever
threatening, but was simply my own opinion? Is this what we’ve come to? A Stepford Society?
If that’s the case, then I gotta say, I am as happy as pig in mud that I have more years behind me than in front of me, for, as an artist, I could never and WOULD never deliberately stifle my expression just to make someone feel better about themselves…while at the same time, would I go out of my way to deliberately offend someone just to pump myself up.
So, what’s your take on this? I’m interested. Please leave your comments here, or send your
thoughts privately to my email.
And have a great day!!