INSTALLMENT #4 of “Get Off the Bandstand”!!
(Previously, I started to touch on caring for your musicians, and I left you hanging when I mentioned an episode that involved a huge recording artist when I was on the road traveling with a big band.)
Here’s the rest of that story…
Our Band Bus had pulled into Harrah’s Club in Reno at about 8 AM after traveling all night from Anaheim, CA where we’d done several shows at Disneyland, as part their “Big Band Festival” that they always had every August.
As soon as we exited the bus, a guy who met us, approached the leader and asked if the band could play back up for the headliner, whose band guys were stuck somewhere in Idaho and were not going to make it to the club in time for her opening night. It was only for one night, so our leader agreed to it, after the price was negotiated.
Everyone had been looking forward to sleeping between some clean sheets for several hours before the show. When you’re on the road for several months a year, this becomes special, to sleep in a hotel because it only happens 3 nights out of the week, the rest of time we sleep on the bus, (but that’s another story, heck, it’s another book).
Well, the star of the show called a rehearsal for 1PM, so we went to our rooms, unpacked and did manage grab a few winks anyway.
As it turned out, her charts were not exactly clear with regard to repeats, intro’s and tags, so the band had to play several times and attempt to figure out how they went. Normally, it’s customary in situations like this to ask the singer what some of the symbols on the charts mean, but this singer,
not being able to read music herself was not helpful at all, and in fact became quite frustrated with the band, saying things like,
“What the Hell’s wrong with you people? Can’t you F***ing Read?”
Or there were exchanges like, “Where’s my starting note? My band always give me my starting note”
“It’s not on the sheet, but we’ll be glad to add it”. (So the band would play the intro and include the song’s starting note in the last bar, which would be played by the piano).
“That’s not the way they do it. I need to hear it better. Can’t the trumpet play it? You guys are F***ing LAME!”
I swear, I was in total shock!
Do you remember the 1979 movie with Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep, where a woman walks out on her husband and 4-year old child, and the young inexperienced dad is left to figure out how to parent his son? There’s a scene where Dustin Hoffman’s character is making breakfast, and his son is observing. As the waffle is being placed into the toaster, the boy announces, “That’s not right. That’s not the way Mom makes waffles. I want waffles that way MOM makes them”, and he runs out of the room.
Well, that’s the best way I can explain how this lady, a humungous star was acting during this rehearsal. Unbelievable!
So the rehearsal, which should have taken about an hour, ended up taking 3 ½ hours, which included several instances of undeserved, foul-mouthed verbal abuse by this so-called “sweetheart” of song to guys who had agreed to back her up and literally save her opening night. They were not happy.
And if the afternoon was not difficult enough, that night, she abused them even further by insulting them in front of the audience, saying things like,
“I know this band sucks, but try to stay with me okay? These A**holes can’t do anything right, but my real band will be here by tomorrow, so be sure to come back, okay?”
I was mortified and could not believe what I was witnessing. A big star like this who couldn’t read a note of music, could not answer simple questions from the musicians when they asked her, “What does this sign mean at Letter D?”, or “Are you coming at after 4 bars or 8”?
She would just yell and use some epithet to deflect the fact that she knew nothing about the music she was singing.
And I must admit that as a singer myself, I felt embarrassed for her, yet, at the time, I have to admit, with guilty pleasure, I thoroughly enjoyed her total humiliation when the band deliberately played several sour notes that threw her off and made her leave the stage in a rage, while the audience laughed their heads off.
She swore that the band would never work again, but as it turned out, it was she who was on her way to all kinds of trouble and pain, and while she HAS managed to hang on to her fan base, even today, I wonder how much tragedy in her life she could have avoided with a little more gratitude and less arrogance!
And as a 19 year-old watching this drama unfold, you can bet I took it all in with great interest, and counted my blessings that I knew how to read a chart and I silently vowed to always treat my band mates well.
I feel the need to mention here that since this incident, it has come out that this singer had a serious disorder and was also unfortunately addicted to pills, so maybe I can let her out of the box on this one. After all, she was young, (only 2 years older than I at the time), and not all that stable to begin with.
Oh and by the way, while I can’t mention this singer’s name, lest I be sued from here to Timbuktu, if you want her name, drop me a private email and I’ll tell ya who it was.
My point is this.
Treat your musicians with civility and respect if you want to be treated that way yourself. And for Heaven’s sake, do NOT hide your inadequacies by making your band look bad. The band, the audience, and certainly the promoters can all see past that ploy, so you only demean yourself!
Let’s get really real here, singers! It’s easy to fall into a trap of self-importance when you’re being showered with the acceptance and accolades of applause…and all the “oohs” and “aahs” of your fans. Yes, I know!
But you cannot imagine how much higher you can go when you use your talent to bring people together…in joyous celebration of friendship that makes them feel love for one another, not just for you. That’s the real prize and it produces highs you will never forget.
In my Book on Promotion, I have a chapter on discovering who you are as a person as well as an artist BEFORE venturing out into the harsh realities of the music business. Part of that knowing is:
- the GRATITUDE for the gifts you possess
- HONORING your musicians
- the APPRECIATION for your audiences
- the CONSTANT THIRST for the continuation of your musical education
- GIVING BACK to your source of power through your music.
Sounds like lofty nonsense to many of you, I know…but hey! We’re just getting started!
TO BE CONTINUED…